Nobody plans on ending up in a hospital bed, unable to speak for themselves. But it happens to families every day, often without warning. When it does, the people who love you are suddenly asked to make hard medical decisions, usually while they are scared, tired, and not sure what you would have wanted.
A living will is how you take that weight off their shoulders. Here are five things every family should understand before that day comes.
1. A living will is not the same as a regular will
This is the most common mix-up we hear. A regular will (sometimes called a last will and testament) deals with your money and property after you pass away. A living will is about your medical care while you are still living but can’t speak for yourself.
It lets you say, ahead of time, what kinds of treatment you would or would not want. That can include life support, breathing machines, feeding tubes, and CPR. You make these choices calmly, now, instead of leaving your family to guess in an emergency room.
2. Name someone to speak for you
Writing down your wishes is half of the job. The other half is choosing a person who will speak for you when doctors have questions your document doesn’t answer. This person is often called a healthcare agent or healthcare proxy.
Pick someone who is calm under pressure, who will follow your wishes even if they would choose differently, and who can be reached quickly. In many states, including Georgia, the living will and the healthcare agent are combined into one advance directive form.
3. Talk about it at the kitchen table, not in the hospital
A document in a drawer only helps if people know it exists and understand what’s in it. Sit down with your spouse, your grown children, and the person you named as your agent. Tell them what matters most to you and why.
These conversations can feel awkward at first. Most families tell us they felt relieved afterward. Nobody has to wonder later, “Is this what Mom would have wanted?”
4. Sign it the right way and keep it where people can find it
Each state has its own rules for signing an advance directive, such as how many witnesses are needed or whether a notary is required. Follow your state’s rules so the document will be honored when it counts.
Then make copies. Give one to your healthcare agent and one to your doctor, and bring one with you if you go into the hospital. Don’t lock the only copy in a safe deposit box that nobody can open on a weekend.
5. Look at it again when life changes
Your wishes may change over time, and so can the people in your life. Take another look at your living will after a marriage, a divorce, a new diagnosis, a death in the family, or if your agent moves far away. A quick review every few years keeps it current.
Getting started is easier than you think
You don’t need to understand legal language to put your wishes in writing. Our Living Will Advance Healthcare Directive walks you through each choice in plain, everyday words, so you can finish it at your own pace and share it with your family.
- For yourself or your family: livingwillandestateguide.com/single-book-orders
- For churches, funeral homes, and organizations (10 to 50+ copies): livingwillandestateguide.com/build-your-bulk-order
Want 10% off your first guide? Join our family list using the sign-up box at the bottom of this page, and we’ll email you a welcome code right away.
Taking care of this now is one of the kindest things you can do for the people you love.
— Jum and Mae RaOof, Founders, New World Publishing
This article is for general education only and is not legal or medical advice. Laws about advance directives vary by state. For advice about your situation, talk with an attorney or your healthcare provider.